By Danielle Kam
Ever wonder why the third date can feel like such a turning point? Well, there’s a big difference between dates one, two, and three, says dating coach and founder of The Broom List Tennesha Wood. “The first date establishes whether there is enough connection and chemistry to warrant another date,” she says. “On date two, people let their guards down a bit and you begin to see a more authentic version of your date. Date three is where most people get vulnerable and are open to sharing what they want for the future.”
The third date is a great opportunity to see if your Bumble match would fit well into your life, notes therapist Sara Stein. Maybe you can envision them getting along with your grandma, your best friend, or your favorite coworker.
But how can you have an awesome third date that allows you to do those things? Here’s the activities that experts suggest.
Do something active
While you might get to know someone based on your conversations on dates one and two, planning an active date three will give you a chance to learn more about how your date behaves in a different environment, allowing you to get to know them based on their actions. Plus, Stein points out that doing something active may be a great way to see if the physical chemistry is there.
Take a dance class (this will really lean into the chemistry aspect), plan a trip to an amusement park, take your dogs for a walk, or get active depending on the season—a bike ride, stand up paddleboarding, apple picking, or sledding are great options. Need further inspiration? Check out more of our active date ideas here.
Do something that involves teamwork
Doing something that fosters a strong bond can help to gauge your compatibility with your date and learn more about what you’re both looking for in a partnership, says love coach Emyrald Sinclaire. Additionally, when you build a bond at the beginning, it sets the core tenets of a relationship (like communication and trust) up for success.
Try playing some bar trivia, create some art together (like at a pottery class or painting class), cook a meal together (in a class or at home), book an escape room, or do some community service with your date.
Do something that your date cares about
The third date is an opportunity to really show interest in your date’s life, says Wood. “Think about activities they’ve previously mentioned or unique things on their bucket list,” she says. “Planning around that will show your date that you’re listening and being thoughtful and deliberate.” Plus, who doesn’t love when the person they’re interested in remembers something they said offhand? Just make sure you’re interested in the activity as well so you can enjoy it too.
Make that hard-to-get reservation at the trendy pop-up they mentioned, or get tickets to the movie they said they wanted to see. Plan a day where you sample appetizers from new restaurants they’ve been dying to go to, or find some live music since they said they missed concerts during quarantine.
The most important thing to remember is that there’s no one-size-fits-all when it comes to dating, says Sinclaire. So whether you go on a hike, make a vase, or score a coveted ticket to a big game, any third date can help you and your Bumble match explore your relationship potential.